What to Do When the Other Parent Withholds Parenting Time in New Jersey: A Guide for Passaic County Parents

By Divorce Mediator Santo Artusa Esq

Co-parenting after a divorce or separation is challenging enough, but when the other parent starts violating court-ordered parenting time, it can feel overwhelming, frustrating, and even hopeless. Whether it’s occasional interference or consistent refusal to comply with your parenting plan, these violations can harm your relationship with your child and violate your legal rights.

If you are a parent in Passaic County, New Jersey, dealing with the withholding of parenting time or violations of a family court order, this article explains your legal options, practical steps, and how to protect your rights in New Jersey family court.

Understanding Parenting Time Orders in New Jersey

In New Jersey, family courts issue parenting time orders (also referred to as visitation orders) as part of a custody arrangement. These court orders are legally binding and enforceable under New Jersey law.

What Parenting Time Includes

Specific days, weekends, holidays, and vacations assigned to each parent
Pick-up and drop-off times and locations
Telephone or video call access (sometimes specified)
Travel restrictions or requirements for notice

When one parent withholds parenting time or refuses to comply with these terms, they are violating a court order.

Is Withholding Parenting Time Legal in New Jersey?

No, withholding parenting time is a violation of a court order. New Jersey law takes parenting time very seriously. The New Jersey Family Court system strongly believes in the best interests of the child, which typically include maintaining a meaningful relationship with both parents unless there is a legitimate reason (such as abuse or neglect) to limit or suspend contact.

Common Excuses Parents Use to Withhold Parenting Time

Claiming the child doesn’t want to go
Saying the child is “too sick” without medical proof
Refusing to communicate or coordinate exchanges
Scheduling activities during your scheduled parenting time
Using disputes over child support as a reason to deny parenting time

None of these excuses justify violating a court order.

What You Can Do If the Other Parent Is Violating Your Parenting Time in Passaic County

1. Document Every Violation

Start by keeping detailed records of every incident, including:

Dates and times of missed parenting time
Screenshots or copies of texts, emails, or voicemails
Notes on what happened and any explanations the other parent gave
Witnesses who can confirm the situation

Documentation is critical if you need to return to court. The more evidence you have, the stronger your case will be.

2. Communicate in Writing

Try to communicate via text or email rather than phone calls or in person. Written communication:

Creates a record of what was said
Helps you stay calm and professional
Prevents “he said, she said” disputes

Keep your tone respectful and focused on the child’s best interests.

3. Avoid Retaliation or Escalation

While it’s tempting to “fight fire with fire,” do not retaliate by withholding child support, cutting off communication, or blocking the other parent’s access when they are scheduled. This can backfire in court and make you appear equally at fault.

4. Consult a Family Law Attorney in Passaic County

If the violations continue, consult with a Passaic County family law attorney who specializes in parenting time enforcement. An experienced lawyer can advise you on the next steps, draft legal filings, and represent you in court if necessary.

5. File a Motion to Enforce Litigant’s Rights

One of the strongest tools available is filing a Motion to Enforce Litigant’s Rights in the Passaic County Superior Court – Family Division, located in Paterson, New Jersey.

What This Motion Can Request:

Make-up parenting time
Sanctions or penalties against the violating parent
Changes to the parenting schedule
Court-ordered counseling or mediation
Attorney’s fees reimbursement

You can file this motion pro se (on your own) or with the help of a family law attorney. Having professional legal representation often strengthens your position.

6. Request Make-Up Parenting Time

In most cases, the court will grant make-up parenting time to compensate for the time you lost. This helps preserve your parent-child bond and shows the court you are focused on the child’s best interests.

7. Seek Contempt of Court Sanctions

If the violations are serious or ongoing, the court can hold the other parent in contempt of court, which may include:

Monetary fines
Mandatory parenting classes
Community service
In extreme cases, jail time

The goal is to compel compliance, not to punish unnecessarily, but the court has the authority to take these actions if needed.

8. Consider Custody Modification

If the other parent’s behavior is harming the child’s well-being, you may also request a modification of custody. This is a more serious step and requires evidence that the child’s best interests are not being served by the current arrangement.

The Emotional Toll on Parents and Children

When one parent interferes with parenting time, it doesn’t just hurt you—it hurts your child. Children benefit emotionally, psychologically, and socially from having consistent and reliable relationships with both parents. When one parent creates barriers to that relationship, children can experience:

Confusion and anxiety
Loyalty conflicts between parents
Fear of upsetting one or both parents
Emotional withdrawal or behavioral issues

It’s essential to remain child-focused, even in the face of repeated violations. Document everything, but avoid placing your child in the middle by:

Not asking them to spy or report on the other parent
Not criticizing the other parent in front of them
Reassuring your child that they are loved by both parents

Can Police Enforce Parenting Time in New Jersey?

Many parents ask whether they can call the police to enforce a parenting time order. While law enforcement may intervene in extreme situations, such as parental kidnapping or custodial interference, they typically do not get involved in everyday parenting time disputes. Instead, family court is the proper venue for enforcement actions.

However, if your child is in immediate danger, or the other parent has taken the child and refused to return them, you may contact local law enforcement or the Passaic County Sheriff’s Department. Be prepared to present a copy of your court order if you take this step.

Emergency Applications and Orders to Show Cause

In urgent situations, such as when a parent refuses to return a child or takes them out of state without permission, you may file an emergency application or Order to Show Cause with the Passaic County Family Court. These filings request immediate judicial intervention to prevent harm or return the child.

Because these motions require specific legal arguments and procedural steps, working with a Passaic County family law attorney can improve your chances of success.

Preventing Future Parenting Time Violations

Using Parenting Apps

Apps like OurFamilyWizard, Talking Parents, or 2Houses can help manage communication, scheduling, and documentation.

Clear and Detailed Court Orders

The clearer your parenting plan, the less room there is for manipulation. If your order is vague or outdated, consider requesting a revised order through the court.

Mediation or Counseling

If both parents are willing, mediation or co-parenting counseling may help reduce conflict and improve communication.

Frequently Asked Questions (FAQs)

1. What qualifies as a violation of parenting time in New Jersey?

Any intentional failure to comply with the terms of a court-ordered parenting time schedule can be considered a violation. This includes refusing to allow scheduled visits, denying make-up time, or consistently arriving late or cancelling without valid reasons.

2. Can I withhold child support if the other parent withholds parenting time?

No. Child support and parenting time are separate legal obligations. You must continue paying child support even if the other parent violates the parenting schedule. Withholding support can hurt your legal standing and may expose you to enforcement actions.

3. What should I include in my documentation of parenting time violations?

You should record:

The date and time of the missed visit
Screenshots or copies of communications
Any excuses or reasons given
Names of witnesses who were present
Notes on how the child was affected

This documentation can be used as evidence if you file a motion in court.

4. How long does it take to resolve a parenting time violation in court?

The timeline varies. Non-emergency motions to enforce typically take a few weeks to a few months, depending on the court’s schedule. Emergency applications may be heard within days if there is immediate risk to the child.

5. Can I represent myself in Passaic County Family Court?

Yes, you can file a Motion to Enforce Litigant’s Rights on your own. However, because family law is complex, many parents choose to work with an experienced Passaic County family law attorney to increase their chances of success and navigate court procedures correctly.

6. What penalties can the court impose on the parent violating parenting time?

The court has several options, including:

Awarding make-up parenting time
Monetary sanctions or fines
Requiring parenting classes or counseling
Changing custody or parenting time terms
Holding the parent in contempt of court

7. Can I change the custody arrangement if the other parent keeps violating the order?

Yes, but you must demonstrate that the violations are ongoing and harmful to the child’s best interests. The court may modify custody or parenting time if the other parent is disrupting the child’s stability or emotional well-being.

8. What if the other parent is saying the child refuses to visit me?

Parents are required to encourage and facilitate the child’s relationship with the other parent. Children do not have the legal authority to decide whether to visit a parent. If the other parent is using this as an excuse, you may need to involve the court to enforce the order.

9. Can I file for enforcement if the parenting order is vague or poorly written?

Yes, but it is better to first request a clarification or modification of the order to make it more detailed. This prevents future disputes and strengthens your ability to enforce the terms.

10. Where do I file a motion to enforce parenting time in Passaic County?

You file your motion at the:

Passaic County Superior Court – Family Division
77 Hamilton Street
Paterson, NJ 07505
Phone: (973) 247-8000

Final Thoughts: Protecting Your Relationship with Your Child

Parental alienation, withholding parenting time, and court order violations are serious issues that can negatively impact your child’s emotional health and your parental rights. You have legal options, and the courts in Passaic County, New Jersey, are prepared to enforce your rights when necessary.

Taking action shows your child that you are committed to being present in their life, regardless of the obstacles. You deserve to be part of your child’s journey, and your child deserves the love and guidance of both parents.

Call for a Free Consultation

If you’re experiencing parenting time violations or co-parenting challenges in Passaic County, our legal team is here to help. We understand how painful and frustrating this can be, and we are committed to fighting for your parental rights.

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Let’s work together to protect your parenting time and secure your child’s future.